from green to black

things

its part of the rough periods in my life now and its
not getting better real soon. guess i just have to
go through it on a day by day kind of thing. having
no fixed source of income, and the many hours to while
away do bring certain kinds of stress when the bills
come and i often wonder how i still manage to pay them
off. some sources of comfort have moved like blogs, and
it feels hollow not to be in the loop on whats going on.
cant complain though since it is self-imposed. it gets
scary to really know-thyself. it gets worse when we
know how much we dont know.

but there are always things to look forward to. attended
a few birthday parties. even more then when we were 16.
yeah 21 is an expensive age to celebrate, alien too.
especially knowing that i havent and wont grow up.

i have been reading benjamin friedman's book on the
moral consequences of economic growth and its been
interesting so far. though it would have been good
if i understood the history accompanying the sources
he cited. but i do realise 1 thing and that is singapores
education system has to change. not that moe is not
doing a good job but we will not produce the kind of
people that will change this place for the better
with our education system. we are so afraid that the
kids forget their singaporean-ness and we keep drumming
into their heads their obligations, loyalties and our
problems that we miss the big picture. we need to show
them the big picture and let them decide where they fit
not fit them where we decide. we need a more liberal
education. we can learn from singapore's history but
there are many more schools of thought that we are not
exposed to until higher up feels that we are so well
controlled that we will stay true to the way the system
has trained us to conform. its not good, some of us know
it but all we can do is talk. and the same cynical
and morbid tones get irritating after awhile. its really
regrettable that philosophy and thinking doesnt really
feature in our curriculum till late. i agree that grading
could be a problem but a lack of exposure seems the greater
evil to me.

oh well, progress is inevitable. lets hope we have a moral
renaissance together with it.

posted by green unseen @ 10:21 AM 0 comments