from green to black

to make it even more uninviting to read

well this would be another long post. so dont bother
if you are blog surfing. well it finally has come to it.
very soon my oh so spiritual and saintly mother will
find herself the enemy of countless people on the
planet. she's not willing to consider any view but
her own, she is attempting to indoctrinate all the
people who come to our house and shes all set for
bible totalitarianism which is really destroying a
way of life that used to be comfortable to be in.
i'm not saying that being spiritual is bad and all, however
a proper earthly application should be the way to go.
just recently, a muslim man abused religion to rape
his daughters and practically i can see my mom doing
the same to our family. she only see's bible verses
that strengthen her case. and she attacks everyone
around the house. she is intolerant of our mannerisms.
and she gives no grace to slip-ups. by focusing so much
on what she doesnt want to happen, she actually started
adopting such behaviours. transference in psychology
indeed. now i'm getting extremely worried for her
because my mom is still a woman who is unable to
think for herself making her a danger to herself and all
around her. secondly to she is listening to tapes from
so many different preachers all the time and because
of point one repeatedly changes her stand that makes her
difficult to talk to. thirdly my mother has not been working
for almost 10 years. the lack of interaction between her
and other adults her age make her socially awkward.
her interactions with people are usually in schools where
she deals with students as she helps out with the christian
programs and with other adults who live the same kind of life,
she has no diversity of interactions and hence expects all
to conform to her dream world. this has caused friction
as we try to avoid her and hence this problem since talking
to her has failed to produce results and no one wants to fight.
this is disastrous as my youngest brother is having his O's,
and he is ill-disciplined and unfocused and escapism from the
house is the last thing he needs. and being the overly protective
mother of him that she is, the rod is being spared too many times
that i feel he is no longer a child of character.
firstly i want to state here just for my benefit.
I am not a magician. i can prop and boost results by several
grades in a short period of time only because those that i have
helped have a thinking problem and not a foundational problem.
furthermore i cannot make a horse drink. if he doesnt want
all the short-cuts and efficient cuts, i too have no intention
of shoving it down is throat. stubborn people have to learn the
hard way and i'd rather he finds himself suffering and learns
than let him go higher and fall harder. I am not clairvoyant
i am able to predict the future because i know the past. i cannot
always be so accurate with the questions and concepts that
come out having removed myself from the education scene
i cannot feel the currents as before. lastly traditionalism and
being overly conservative is the biggest problem in times like
these where the ability to adapt and improvise are key assets.
i'm extremely dissapointed in how my house is run. i hope
that i am somehow wrong. i would really hate to say i told you so.
especially when i told you so leaves no tears to cry and no
option but regret...

oh yeah i'm trying to find those notes for you sam. however it seems
like all whom i've given free tuition to have never returned me my
stuff. heres where i hope you'd be different. spend some time and
learn to find the way. once you mastered it, you'll really understand
that all studying time is wasteful once you got the trick. i'll guide you
along but lets hope you get there

posted by green unseen @ 8:59 AM